Connections

Tammy: See what happens when your match is truly magnetic

She felt like my perfect match: her INFJ with my INTJ. She and I shared the same dominant cognitive function — Introverted Intuition (Ni). That common ground gave us an instant sense of recognition, as if we were two minds running on the same operating system, vs. a Mac trying to talk to a PC. We spoke the same unspoken language of connections, patterns and meaning. See story

Corinne: This whirlwind romance was no accident

She was a vision of loveliness — the memory of her standing there is etched in my mind. I walked her to my boat, where the roses waited, alongside a bottle of French Champagne and a bowl of grapes set on a teak cockpit table I had refinished myself with nine coats of marine varnish. She admired the roses. We drank. We ate. Then she said, “Kiss me.” So I did. But she didn’t stop. See story

Kourtney: Your turn-ons don't matter. Your MagneticMatch's do.

Her name was Kourtney. Her game was Scrabble. She beat me nine games out of ten. That’s exactly why I fell for her. Because, as an INTJ, learning is what turns me on. And I learned by losing to her. For instance, Kourtney had memorized all 107 Scrabble-legal two-letter words. That made her a winner — in more ways than one. See story

Wanda: When laughs alone can’t make a MagneticMatch last

I used to own and fly airplanes, including the a highly modified version of Aerostar Tom Cruise flew in “American Made.” In one scene, the actress playing his wife climbs on top of him and they make out while he’s at the controls. Not that Wanda ever did that. But Tom Cruise proved she could have. Our story was not as steamy. It had more to do with frost. See story

Fiona: When someone shows you who they are, believe them

On the eve of our coffee date, I sent her a text to confirm. But in my haste, I accidentally pasted in a message that was meant for a friend — a message that mentioned two other women. I was horrified. Embarrassed. The INTJ in me immediately started damage control. I texted Fiona…See story

Vanessa: Ghosted by my Magnetic Match: the INFJ door slam

“I like your humor. I like your honesty. I like how forthright you are. I appreciate your vulnerability. I like your intelligence. I like how easy it is to talk to you. You make me laugh.” Then, one evening, I described the intensity of my previous relationship with Tammy. And I never heard from Vanessa again. See story

Betty: Why your type is not your type

She arrived at two o’clock for what was supposed to be a simple afternoon sail. We returned to the marina at eight, the day already too good to end. The sun dropped, the air cooled, and instead of saying goodbye, we slipped below into the cabin, settling across from one another at opposite ends of the settee. And then we talked. Until dawn. See story

Karen: A cautionary tale

I had looked forward to our date like you look forward to a movie that you believe you will love. You settle in, you’re excited when it starts, but the beginning is underwhelming. You tell yourself, just wait, it’s going to get better. With this cast? With this director that you love? It’s gotta get better. But after fifteen minutes, the truth sets in: they got nuthin.’ See story

Hillary: She never gave up. But I gave up trying to make her laugh

With Hillary, there was never ambiguity. You always knew where you stood, because she would tell you. Some people found her blunt. I found her refreshing. If I wanted her respect, I had to bring clarity, precision and substance. See story