4) How to post photos to attract your Magnetic Match

n swipe-based dating apps, photos aren’t just part of your profile — they ARE your profile. Your written words only matter if your photos pass the test.

And here’s the hard truth: people don’t spend five or even two seconds deciding whether to swipe left or right. It takes just one-tenth of a second for people to make a decision.

And you don’t get a second chance to make a first impression.

So if your primary photo doesn’t land instantly — sharp, expressive, and emotionally resonant — your match is gone before they ever read a word about you.

Why photos matter more than you can imagine

The modern brain is trained to process imagery at lightning speed. The same process applies to dating apps. In the fraction of a second your photo is on the screen, someone has already judged your attractiveness, your energy and even your trustworthiness.

And be honest — don’t you do the same thing?

Profile pics: One do, lots of don’ts

Ladies, men need to see your face. Without a hat. Without sunglasses.
Guys, if you have a beard, you gotta keep it neat. Nobody wants to date a billygoat.
No bathroom selfies.
No sunsets.
No photos from your distant past — unless you have a Time Machine that transports back to high school.
No close-ups of flowers.
No views of nature (unless you’re in them).
No driver’s seat selfies.
No cropped-out exes.
No hats that hide your hairline (or what’s left of it 😉).
No “Man with Fish”.
And cool it with the pet photos — because nobody wants to date your dog.

One more thing: Smile guys, because women don’t believe you have teeth unless they can see them.

Picking photos by Myers-Briggs type

There are countless ways to take profile photos, but only a handful of strategies will truly attract your Magnetic Match (MM).

To know which ones matter, you need to think less about yourself and more about what resonates with your MM.

If you’re unsure what to emphasize, revisit Chapter 2, How to spot your Magnetic Match. Do a deep dive into your MM’s type and review the qualities, values, and priorities that matter most to them.

To do this, click the link that says “in-depth” listed under their Myers-Briggs type. Always use that “in-depth” link to review — don’t just guess.

And here’s the key: if your MM lists an activity they enjoy, don’t just tell them you do it too — show them. If they love hiking and you hike, include a photo of yourself on a trail. If they mention sailing, and you sail, post a photo of yourself at the helm.

It’s always better to show than to tell.

Here are some examples for just a handful of Myers-Briggs types so you can see how the principles work in practice.

Once you’ve studied these, go back to the “in-depth” section for your MM’s type and apply the same approach.

Attracting INTJs

INTJs are drawn to competence and clarity. They want to see you mastering something, not just smiling vaguely at the camera. Show yourself cooking a complex dish, repairing a sailboat or presenting an idea. A minimalist background works best, because INTJs dislike clutter. Avoid chaotic party shots. One thoughtful, understated smile communicates confidence without trying too hard.

Attracting INFJs

INFJs crave depth and authenticity. Photos with pets — especially dogs or cats — signal warmth and empathy. They also respond strongly to contemplative shots in nature: walking a trail, sitting near water or reading outside. Artistic or symbolic images catch their eye because they hint at hidden layers. Avoid overly staged glamour shots — INFJs spot inauthenticity instantly.

Attracting ENFPs

ENFPs love energy and spontaneity. Group fun shots work because they radiate connection and joy. They’re drawn to bright colors, laughter and a sense of motion. A quirky or playful image — a silly hat, a dance move, a spontaneous adventure — can be irresistible. But avoid posting too many serious or stiff portraits, or you’ll come across as boring.

Attracting ESTJs

ESTJs respect responsibility and structure. They like seeing evidence of leadership, achievement and reliability. A shot of you captaining a boat, hosting a family dinner, or organizing an event signals competence. Well-lit, professional portraits also work well. Avoid sloppy or chaotic images, which suggest a lack of control.

Attracting INFPs

INFPs are moved by authenticity, creativity, and soul. They’re drawn to artistic or unconventional photos: you sketching in a notebook, stargazing, or barefoot on the beach. They appreciate quirkiness and individuality, not polish. Avoid overly glamorous shots that feel posed or performative.

Crowd pleasers

Pets: Universally appealing, signaling warmth and empathy. (Just don’t overdo it)
Travel: Shows curiosity, but keep it humble, not bragging. And make sure you’re in the photo.
Nature: Resonates with both introverts (reflection) and extroverts (adventure). But again, no Hallmark cards. You gotta be in the photo.
Action: Cooking, sailing, hiking, painting — these show what you love to do.

Dealbreakers

Too many group photos: who’s who?
Low-resolution or blurry shots
Every photo indoors at the same angle
Use of filters

“Mr. DeMille, I’m ready for my close-up now.”

Think of your profile photos as a mini-movie:

A clear, smiling headshot (warmth and approachability)
Full body, natural setting (honesty, confidence)
Doing something you love (depth and passion)
Social proof (with friends, but only one group shot)
Personality photo (pet, humor, or adventure)

Remember, your Magnetic Match is drawn to your essence — empathy, depth, creativity, intensity — not just a shared hobby. But if you do share a passion, by all means, show it.

Because in a world where first impressions are made in less than a blink, your photos are the single most powerful signal you can send.